I always knew I wanted to be a mother. No question in my mind. I have a super-mom, really one of the great ones, and I was always convinced motherhood was one of the greatest things and not just a thing society expects of women. On the other hand, I come from a family of mostly high-achievers in education and career matters. I knew after high school I’d go to college and then a graduate degree. I didn’t always plan to get a doctoral degree but I did end up all the way there.
So, you start putting your plans in schedule. Go to school, work and travel before 30. Then get married at some point and then the kids. That pushes you easily into the after-35 downward slope of fertility. But I never knew there was such a steep decline. You always hear about women getting pregnant after 40 so you think it’s common, even if it’s still commented by people.
My husband and I moved in together when I was 28 and got married 2 years later. I was in the middle of my PhD at the time so I was on the pill. At 33 I finished my studies but we waited another year for things to settle.
Finally it was time. I was 34 and felt that it was a great time to get pregnant. I went to my obgyn and told him we wanted to have kids now. He gave me some blood work to make sure I was not in risk of infectious diseases and found out that my chickenpox vaccine (from some years before) didn’t work, for some reason, and I wasn’t immune. I went to get vaccinated, they recommended 2 doses which means waiting for 3 months between them. Then the vaccine was not available anywhere for a few months and finally about 9 months went by. I could have had a kid in the time it took to go through this immunization.
Lesson number one: Don’t wait until you’re ready to conceive to find out you’re missing an important vaccine, or have a vitamin deficiency, or anything that can be easily fixed but could take time. You could tell your doctor you want to have kids in a few years and s/he can start evaluating those things.
A Stork's Journey 